Chivalry Is Tipping $10 In The Champagne Room
Sponsored by John Cochrane
To Richard Garfield, Ph.D
for his contributions to the Magic community and elsewhere.
The Script For Today's Comic!
#14
Chivalry Is Tipping $10 In The Champagne Room
5 Panels
Panel 1:
(Tom and Tanner are in the living room. Tanner is three beers into a six-beer pack. Tom is watching, conspicuously not drinking.)
TOM: "Slow down on that beer, Tanner."
TANNER: "My girlfriend cheated on me, Tom. I need at least one night of heavy alcohol to recuperate."
TANNER: "This isn't beer, it's anesthesia."
Panel 2:
TOM: "Yeah, and you've already broken our door with your surgery. That's $100 down the drain."
TANNER: "I'll pay you back. But I was getting out of control, and I needed a friend to watch over me while I debase myself."
Panel 3:
(Close-up on Tanner, distraught.)
TANNER: "I don't know what else to do, man. I was loyal to Amy. I got her a car. I gave her my couch. I gave her my time."
TOM (off-panel): "She wanted a doormat, and you gave her your back."
Panel 4:
TANNER (angry): "That's not true!"
TOM: "How many times does this have to happen, Tanner? People value you for what you're worth."
TOM: "You're a walking 'TAKE ONE – FREE!' sign. If she wants you back tomorrow, you'll go crawling. And you'll apologize to her for leaving. That's not loyalty, that's insanity."
Panel 5:
TANNER (sullenly, drunkenly, with dignity): "I'm a Knight in a world that doesn't need saviors."
TOM: "Tanner, you're a bouncer at a strip club."
TANNER: "Please. I protect the ladies faire."