Warrior Needs Food - Badly
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The Script For Today's Comic!
PANEL 1:
(Tanner and Tom are talking somewhere.)
TANNER: "...So then we grouped up to investigate the Chinese ambassador, and
as a reward we got the thanks of the whole world!"
TOM: "Man, I wish I could play City of Heroes. I wanna be a blaster!"
PANEL 2:
TANNER (sipping coffee): "So why not? You've got the gaming rig for it."
TOM: "You remember when I played the last Elder Scrolls game?"
PANEL 3 (wide shot):
(This panel should be shot from the perspective of the computer monitor,
looking out at a frighteningly close--up view of Tom, bathed in monitor
light, as Karla and Guthrie look on in concern. Tom is haggard, his cheeks
drawn and stubbled, his hair wild even by his experience, wearing a filthy
shirt. His eyes are glazed, staring a little off to one side [not at the
reader, that'd be creepy]. He has one hand on the mouse, if you can show
that.)
KARLA (concerned, holding up a bottle): "Tom, you have to stop urinating in
the Pepsi bottles after you've drank them. Go to the bathroom!"
TANNER (solemnly, with the air of a doctor diagnosing a fatal illness): "I
wouldn't worry about it. He's too dehydrated to exude fluid now."
TOM (stares at screen)
PANEL 4 (wide shot):
(Same angle, basically the same shot, except this is several years earlier
and now Tom is wearing a cut-off shirt and his hair is much more punk. Go
nuts, but mohawks are so played.)
CAPTION: "...or the time I played Diablo II?"
TANNER (concerned): "Tom, you've beaten Diablo with the Amazon, the
Barbarian, and the Sorceress. What's left?"
TOM (not looking at Tanner): "Necromancer, Paladin."
TOM: "Call the band. Tell them I won't be in this week."
PANEL 5:
(Back to the conversation.)
TANNER (rubbing his hand on the back of his neck in embarrassment): "So for
you, a game without an actual end credit would be..."
TOM: "...Like The Ring, where I die seven days after I first look at the screen, but without that happy ending."