Sticks On A Plane

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The Script For Today's Comic!

> STICKS ON A PLANE
>
> SCENE:
> Tom and Karla are cramped, uncomfortably, into a couple of airline seats,
> with all of the non-space this entails. They both look really
> uncomfortable
> and harried.
>
> KARLA: Goddamned airport security. They took all my makeup. They even
> took
> my Chapstick!
>
> TOM: Yeah, well, that terrorist Chapstick'll get them every time.
>
> KARLA: Look at me! My lips get so dry on these trips....
>
> (Like a magician producing a bouquet of flowers, Tom holds up a small tube
> of Chapstick as if it were the Holy Grail. This should be a very stylish
> moment, and he is smug with triumph.)
>
> TOM: Did you ask for... Chapstick?
>
> KARLA (overjoyed): Oh my God! Where did you get that?
>
> TOM: I'm a punk rocker, baby. I know how to smuggle. The man can't hold
> ME
> down!
>
> (She begins to apply it to her lips.)
>
> KARLA: But how?
>
> TOM (with an insane confidence, utterly unaware that this might be
> troublesome): I stuffed it in my underpants.
>
> KARLA (stopping applying the Chapstick as she realizes where it's been,
> disgusted): Okay, maybe this isn't what I had hoped for.
>
> TOM (thrusting his hands into his crotch): Hang on, I put some Kit-Kats in
> here as well....

Ferrett Says

There are people concerned with continuity, who may ask: “But where does this take place?” After all, we didn’t establish in the previous strip that Tom and Karla were going anywhere, and Monday’s strip will see them back and firmly ensconced in their precious household.

But if you must know where they are heading, it’s to The Land Of Cheap Jokes. Which I myself visited while being on a plane in Germany, pathetically holding all of my worldly identification in a transparent plastic bag as they yanked my wife’s Chapstick out of her de-moisturized hands. At which point I vowed to get my revenge in the only way that I possibly could….

….via a vengeful Latin rhythm.

No, serious. We do this via a cheap cartoon that nobody in the FAA will read. Thus is the scale of my revenge. If Penny Arcade frickin’ complained about the air traffic, millions of fans would cause the face of American politics to change. But us?

This is the best we can do. One strip set in the void, a gem to irk continuity freaks.

Sorry, folks.

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